My friend Sheila Hall and I have been know to chat and Google Hangout. We end up saying very weird things because we are both moms we don’t even question what the other says. Its so much fun.
She was nice enough to transcribe our funny sayings on Monday. Here it is.
Odd Stuff Moms are Wont to Say
Mari and I have a number of things in common. We are writers, made of awesomesauce, and love to read. One of the biggest is that we are both moms: with kids that cannot, for the life of them, allow any deviation from their own attention. Keeping this in mind, we have had some interesting conversations that are occasionally interrupted with the odd comment to our offspring.
If you are not a parent, you may worry about some of the things that were said. Trust me, they are fine. We also are not deranged, no matter how it may appear to the outsider. If you are a parent… well, I am sure the stuff that comes out of your mouth is just as hilarious.
1. “Please get off my head.”
2. “I don’t enjoy being shot. Move your gun.”
3. “Stop tucking in your underwear.”
4. “Stop licking your leg.”
5. “Don’t eat the blanket. I don’t care how much fiber is in it.”
6. “Go be crazy over there.”
7. “No, I don’t know if Hansel (from Hansel and Gretel) is a diabetic.”
8. “Don’t strangle yourself.”
9. “If you keep this up, Mommy is going to need a time out.”
10. “Leave your hole alone!”
11. “I need to poke you.”
12. “Please don’t throw the guns anymore.”
13. “I am NOT smelling your hands!”
14. “Because Wiki said so.”
Which is your favorite? What weird things have you said to your kids? Can you tell what I said or what Sheila said?
Mari Wells 
Hooray for weird Parent Sayings!!! This was sooo much fun!! I can’t wait to do it again. ❤
Knowing us, it will be soon! 😀 Thanks for being such a great friend and for writing this down! 😀
I love “Please get off my head”! What situation could you possibly need to use that line in? Did the child actually scramble up onto your head, or were you bending over/lying down and they got you that way?
More like he likes to lay ON me on when we sit on the couch. Then scrambles up my back and putting his hands and head on my head. So he is taller, get it? *snickers*
Lol. Well, as long as he has a good reason for doing it. And “I’m on Mommy’s head!” doesn’t count as a reason.
Most kids think I’m on Mommy’s head is a wonderful reason. I think it’s a lot like, King of the hill sort of thing. LOL
Children love to do either and or of those two situations.
Hahaha! I’m not a mother, but I do work with elementary kids so I have had to say things like that before. 😀
i didn’t think about teachers saying this stuff, How about you, Sheila? Did you think teachers would say these things too?
I think they have to, just like us! That would be a fun list to hear as well!!
I can hear each of you saying these things to your kids. Ahh I am laughing way to hard over here.
It is funny, and so so seriously true. 😀
I know. I think I like please get off my head! That might actually be my favorite … and all Sheila
You’re right, it was Sheila. Now you have to pick one I said. 😀
That is a challenge I accept.
I’m waiting. Never keep a woman waiting.
He knows how my youngest is and has seen the little dude ON my head! I really don’t think that he can get the ALL right, though. 😉
Probably not. 😀 He doesn’t know me well enough. 😀
Oh I recognise so many of these 😀 school holidays here and watching Dr Who on Netflix Daleks flying across the sky when my four year old points and asks “what do those cheesegraters do?”
I’ve only seen 4 or 5 shows of Dr. Who, I really like it but if I watch it I won’t write. It’s a tough decision.
I wonder where these kids come up with the things they say.
Cheesegraters…..maybe he’s going to make a pizza?
no its because of the dalek shape he thinks they look like the multi sided grater we have
I think I remember that ship now. I would have still said they wanted pizza just to see what he did. LOL
he would probably have started demanding pizza himself lol
LOL, I’m almost to the point of demanding pizza right now too. He and I aren’t so different, we both would want pizza. 🙂 He seems too cute.
well today his luck is out he is having new potatoes and fish actually he loves fish its getting him to eat potatoes that is hard work
I love fish too, and potatoes.. 😦 Now I want fish…
Best post ever! This list could go on for years.
–Julie
It really could. Sheila and I say some really strange things to our kids..I’m sure you do it too. HUGS Julie, thanks for coming by. Loved your excerpt on your blog!