Friday Fictioneers 1/11/13


It’s Friday and you know what that means… Friday Fictioneer . Thank you to Rochelle for hosting this wonderful community. If you haven’t looked into Friday Fictioneers you should. It’s so much fun.

Last week I didn’t see we were suppose to add our genre..Sorry. I really don’t like to classify my FF. It gives me a little more freedom. I can’t see if we are suppose to do it this month. I’m going for mainstream this week.

copyright-roger-cohen

copyright-roger-cohen

Thanks to Roger Cohen for the photo and a bit of education.

**Memories**

An old withered hand turned the knob, and pulled open the door.

“Mama!” someone said down the hall.

Her eyes moved over the two cellos standing face to face. “Oh Jack. . . “ a hand with its fingers crooked with age reached to caress the magnificent instruments. “I’ll wait for you Jack. You know where to find me.”

“Mama,” the panicked voice echoed again.

“Mama,” A young woman sighed as she held out her hand. “Please don’t do that again,” her shoulders heaved.

“Jack?”

“Oh, Mama, Papa died ten years ago.” She wiped the tears from Mama’s eyes.

Word Count: 99


PS** Do you guys remember the prompt from November 22, 2012? The bronze face and pointing hand? I got a lot of response about the story I wrote for that prompt. I took it out a bit farther. Waitingforaname.wordpress.com said she was really interested in reading it. I promised her I would put up what I wrote. SOOOO…..
If you are interested in reading more about it, come back on Saturday. 😀 Here is the link

Advertisements

38 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers 1/11/13

  1. Nice, Mari. Another great story!

  2. Anne Orchard says:

    A very poignant story Mari. How sad to keep being reminded that you have lost someone you love. Would be kinder to say ‘he’s popped out for a paper’ – but not such a good story, of course.

  3. Sandra says:

    A very sad story, nicely done.

  4. Beautifully observed story about the way life changes as we age – well done 🙂

  5. Poignant has already been said, but I’ll say it again. Nice work. Looking forward to Saturday’s post!

    • mari wells says:

      Thanks for your encouragement. 😀 I’m waiting to see what you think of it. O.o Super nervous…

      • I’m interested to see if you take it in the same direction I would – or in a totally different direction. (Kind of like how it’s always neat to see the similarities among and differences between FF stories). Either way, I’m sure it will be eloquently written!

  6. This is what you hope and pray doesn’t happen as you get older. Good job.

    • mari wells says:

      Yes, my Nana had it. She would call me my mothers name, my mom was called my grandma’s name and so on. Its very sad, and I felt the need to write about it this week.

  7. Hi Mari,
    Alzheimer’s is tragic, and very sad for the loved ones of the afflicted. My dad, unfortunately spent the last few years of his life with it. You did a great job in your story of capturing the sadness. Ron

    • mari wells says:

      I’m sorry to hear about your father. I hope a cure is found soon, so no one else will go through this. No only does the person, but their family’s are all affected.
      Thank you for your kind comment. 😀

  8. billgncs says:

    this was a moving tale, I felt the panicked voice.

  9. kz says:

    oh this is just heartbreaking.. a great piece

  10. wmqcolby says:

    Whoa! Right between the eyes! Hit home. Super-duper!

  11. brudberg says:

    Oh, this is sad, a close relative getting confused is hard. Well told also.

  12. tedstrutz says:

    Powerfully 99, Mari… Beautifully written.

    Hey, it’s Sat. I’ll have to go find your piece.

  13. dmmacilroy says:

    Dear Mari,

    What a heart rending story. Did she climb into the storage closet with the double basses?

    Aloha,

    Doug

  14. I like this. We never know what those with dementia really do remember or the feelings they feel. I’ve known the fright of losing someone who’s wandered off. I’m celebrating the fact that she found the memory her husband in the form of his music, tucked away in a closet. You did a nice job with this.

  15. yerpirate says:

    Nicely done, and touching..

  16. Abraham says:

    Well written, sad story.
    Thanks for the link to the other story :-)!

  17. rich says:

    sometimes random objects hold a lot more than just what they seem. this reminds me of one silly little christmas decoration that i can’t look at without thinking of my mother. something about it just connects. well done.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s